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Friday, 25 May 2012

ARTICLE: Desirable Women = Football League


 Dating a desirable woman is like a being a team in a professional football league.


How on earth, you ask?! Let me explain.

Every desirable woman is like a trophy. The Championship. Even the average mediocre ones are as well, but more so the desirable women. Lots of men use social media to scout talent, for a potential mate. If you are single and you claim to not do this, please stfu and stop lying. Places like twitter have just galvanized my 'Woman is a trophy' anecdote.

At the start of a season, twenty teams all begin on naught points. Each team is different, each team has a unique skill set, some have an illustrious history, some are newer teams, some have pedigree, some have very little, some have lots of money, and thus are better equipped to compete in a cut-throat league where scoring and winning is all that counts. Those who don’t have the financial backing have to make due with clever tactics and luck.

As the season begins, many of the favourites can be spotted by their winning mentality and edge, beating off weaker opponents at will, and they rise to the top of the table, while others have to scrap it out in the middle of the table, to end up neither here nor there and some desperately try to not get relegated, because, you know, being relegated means competing in a lower league with lower standards and rewards. No-one wants that...

During the season your team battles with injuries, and setbacks. Mental strength is key.

Wages must be paid to keep your team happy and playing well, new players must be bought, etc; large amounts of money must be spent in the pursuit of the title.


Sometimes you'll think you're winning a game, then in the dying seconds you'll concede a late goal and you'll drop points, vital points in the pursuit of the title!

YOU have to be weary of the other teams' tactics. Some use the long ball game, some teams pass the ball around a lot and keep possession, other teams are very skillful and tricky, others still are all out attack whilst others play very negatively and defensively.

They might seem like you, but they have a similar goal and on the surface, an old ally is gunning for the same prize, so be weary and circumspect..

One thing is for sure, if you warm the bench, you can’t play, if you don’t play, you can’t shoot, if you don’t shoot, you can’t SCORE, if you can’t score, you can’t win the title.

It’s simple really. Once the season draws to a close, and you have that Championship in your grasp, your team is bruised and battered and tired, but you’re nearly there, that’s when you need to be at your best, it’s at this moment when any team can come and steal the title away from you, BUT THEN…

You win it. The glory and honour of winning the title!! It’s yours! Finally! After all the hard work! You revel in your victory, you parade your trophy around. You wallow in its splendor. You no longer have to dream, it’s here, and it’s YOURS!!

But guess what. Come next season, YOU have to fight off all the other teams, coz NOW, all of them want that trophy, that Championship MORE THAN ANYTHING! This is when your title defense starts, and you have to do it ALL OVER AGAIN.

Can you see what I mean?


So ja. Dating a desirable woman is like a being a team in a professional football league. 






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